The 4 Steps to a Successful Marriage by Sam and Terry Krause, Createspace Publishers, ISBN 978-1466474413 ©2011, $12.95, p. 118
By Fred Reiss, Ed.D.
WINCHESTER, California–There is an old adage about marriage, which goes something like this: a woman marries the perfect man and then spends the rest of her life trying to change him. What is no joke is that the divorce rate for first-time marriages in America is somewhere between forty and fifty percent, depending on the source of the data, and for American Jews, the divorce rate is about thirty percent.
Now husband and wife, Sam and Terry Krause, through their latest work, The 4 Steps to a Successful Marriage, offer a prescription for deepening spousal relationships based on nearly thirty years of marriage and on wisdom drawn from secular sources and the full spectrum of Jewish texts. Using real-life stories, anecdotes from the Hasidic and mystic masters, and biblical and Talmudic quotes, the Krauses relate a viable and potent process for bringing together couples in teetering relationships as well as increasing the depth of understanding between two committed people.
In her book, The Secret, Rhonda Byrne tells us that the secret to success is The Law of Attraction, something akin to: will it and it will come. In a chapter entitled “The Secret,” The 4 Steps to a Successful Marriage offers a more powerful secret, called “re-creation,” the redirection of an argument from conflict to understanding. It is a secret difficult to put into practice, but once achieved is much more likely to have the desired outcome of a closer and endearing relationship with one’s partner.
What follows is an explanation of the four steps to a thriving marriage. The first step, called “Sealing the Deal,” is for couples about to marry. The remaining three are for those in a committed relationship: “Getting It Off,” “Our Roles: Venus vs. Mars,” and “Nourish the ‘Soul’.”
Together, the related stories and examples tug at our emotions as much as our reasoning and collectively deliver a simple yet elegant plan to help save a failing relationship and bring spouses closer to their partner. The 4 Steps to a Successful Marriage is an elegant and powerful book in a small package.
*
Dr. Fred Reiss is a retired public and Hebrew school teacher and administrator. He is the author of The Standard Guide to the Jewish and Civil Calendars;Ancient Secrets of Creation: Sepher Yetzira, the Book that Started Kabbalah, Revealed; and Reclaiming the Messiah. He can be reached at fred.reiss@sdjewishworld.com