By Laurie Baron
SAN DIEGO─ One of the proportionate responses to North Korea’s hacking of Sony Pictures that President Obama is considering is taking Dennis Rodman hostage and locking him in a cell with Dick Cheney who relishes the opportunity to wire his defibrillator to Rodman’s body if North Korea ever attempts another cyberattack on the United States.
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Ridley Scott’s new movie Exodus has sparked protests from African Americans who are appalled that a film about Moses and ancient Egypt cast only white actors as lead characters. You know you have problems with political correctness when the descendants of slaves don’t find a film about the exodus of the Jews from Egypt liberating.
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After a European Union Court removed Hamas from the EU’s list of terrorist organizations, members of Hamas celebrated in a tunnel they are currently digging to launch a terrorist attack in Israel.
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President Obama announced that the United States would normalize its relations with Cuba. Cuba is looking forward to exporting cigars, sugar, and vintage American cars to the United States.
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Upon hearing of Sony Picture’s decision not to release the movie The Interview, Charlie Chaplin was so irate that he became speechless in heaven.
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Baron is professor emeritus of history at San Diego State University. He may be contacted via lawrence.baron@sdjewishworld.com . San Diego Jewish World points out to new readers that this column is satire, and nothing herein should be taken literally.