By Laurie Baron
SAN DIEGO─ Saudi Arabia posted an advertisement for hiring eight new executioners. If it does not receive enough applications, it may outsource beheadings to ISIS.
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Nine people were killed and one-hundred seventy arrested following a shootout between rival motorcycle gangs in Waco, Texas. The US government is offering amnesty to those who are currently jailed in return for training the Iraqi army.
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Governor Bobby Jindal issued an executive order affirming religious liberty in Louisiana to effectively ban gay marriage in the state. Immediately thereafter, a traffic jam worse than the one during the mandatory evacuation for Hurricane Katrina developed on the highways heading out of New Orleans.
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The biggest surprise in the final episode of Mad Men was that the last person Don Draper embraced was a man.
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Senator Rand Paul delivered a ten-hour filibuster against the renewal of the Patriot Act. Fortunately, this was ten-hours shorter than Ted Cruz’s filibuster and did not include any references to Dr. Seuss’ Green Eggs and Ham and Star Wars. Hillary Clinton wondered if her honoraria would be even higher if her paid speeches were longer.
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Baron is professor emeritus of history at San Diego State University. He may be contacted via lawrence.baron@sdjewishworld.com . San Diego Jewish World points out to new readers that this column is satire, and nothing herein should be taken literally.