Meet the man behind ‘Mensch on a Bench’

By Dan Bloom

CHIAYI CITY, Taiwan — ​For a creative and innovative Jewish man from the Boston area, Hannukah was always a great holiday — but​ with just one thing missing. That thing turned out to be “The Mensch on a Bench” and he created it.

Meet Neal Hoffman, ​the 30-something interfaith dreamer with a new family Hanukkah concept he has dubbed “Mensch on a Bench.”  For those who’ve yet to experience the phenomenon, “Mensch on a Bench” is a bearded and smiling doll, garbed in tallit and black hat, which will hold the shamash candle in readiness for lighting the hannukiah.

Wanting to know more about what his new tradition is all about, I engaged Hoffman in an e-mail interview.

I started off by telling Hoffman that ​I felt ​ his “Mensch on a Bench” concept is a wonderful addition to Hanukkah lore, and I congratulated him for adding a very nice touch to the annual Hanukkah celebrations in North
America. When I asked if he, as a Jewish kid growing up in Marblehead in the 1980s, ever felt left out at Christmastime during the long holiday season every December.

“I was born in 1977, so was growing up on the North Shore of Boston in the 1980s, Marblehead had a Jewish population of about 40 percent, so for me, it was normal that Hanukkah and Christmas were evenly split,”
Hoffman said. “I remember growing up that the Christian kids were jealous of our eight nights of presents and we were jealous of their one big morning. On a bigger level, outside of my town, it was clear that Christmas was a much bigger deal than Hanukkah, and I did start to feel left out at times.”

Growing up grew up in a Conservative Jewish household, Hoffman said his family never put a Christmas tree in their home and never even considered it.

“Hanukkah was a pretty big deal for us, and we celebrated it in a fairly traditional way with latkes, dreidels, and presents,” he told San Diego Jewish World. “I love that my parents instilled a strong Jewish identity in me that I am able to pass down to my children now.”

I asked how the amazing national media attention about his ”Mensch on a Bench” success had impacted him and his family, Hoffman said: “The best part of the whole project has been watching how proud my Jewish
mother is. She kvells non-stop.”

” The other great thing that makes me feel good is seeing the impact that we have having bringing all of these Jewish families nationwide together for Hanukkah,” he added. “I love the photos that our fans send us each year of their families celebrating with the Mensch. It’s amazing.”
How does Hoffman see the way the Mensch on a Bench phenomenon caught on in recent years?

“I think that Jews in America have taken this minor holiday and made it into a major one, for sure,” he said. “With that in mind, I am trying to bring more Judaism and tradition back into the holiday. Rather than have Jews adopt secular traditions, let’s create traditions that celebrate our Jewish past.”

Letters pour in, of course, from happy moms and dads and children, too, Hoffman said.

“My favorite letter was from a mother who showed me the book report that her eight year old did on our ‘Mensch on a Bench’ picture book,” he said. “And the letters of praise and happiness I get from bubbes– and zadies, too — they are wonderful.”

Hoffman is married to a Catholic woman, and she’s been along for this Mensch on a Bench ride as well, he said.

“When we first met, on our second date, I told her that I would be bringing my kids up Jewish and if that was a problem, we should probably not date,” he said. “Now over 15 years later, we are happily married, raising our kids in the Jewish faith, and respecting the fact that Mommy believes something differently than we do. In our home, we don’t have a Christmas tree, but I respect that in this generation, Jewish and Christian families believe in being creative and designing their own holiday traditions.”

“My wife has been so supportive,” he added. “She has been with me to visit many temples, Hanukkah parties, and even the White House Hanukkah party in Washington. While this was not what she expected when we got married, she loves me for who I am and what I am trying to do.”

Summing up his innovative new tradition, hatched in New England and now popular all over North America — Canada, too — Hoffman said that he is proud of having created a legacy that his own children can be proud of and eventually take over from him later on.

“Our mission is to bring families together, and we are having a blast doing that,” he said.

So what’s next for this mensch from Marblehead?

“I have tons of ideas and am trying to focus and figure out where I can have the biggest impact,” he said, looking to the future. “Maybe a Mensch Haggadah coming for Passover in 2017.”

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Bloom, based in Taiwan, is an inveterate web surfer.  He may be contacted via dan.bloom@sdjewishworld.com . Comments below must be accompanied by the writer’s first and last name and by his or her city and state of residence. (City and country for those outside the U.S.)