By Michael R. Mantell, Ph.D.
SAN DIEGO — King Solomon wrote in Proverbs 24:17, “Though a righteous person may fall seven times, he will arise.” In more contemporary words, “Winners are not people who never fail, but people who never quit.” Does this mean that when you fall you just get up again and keep going? Perhaps.
But it also suggests something deeper. For a person to succeed it seems that a person must fall, learn from errors, and grow past where he or she was. That’s what the ascending rungs of the ladder are there for, to help us grow past ourselves, to exit our mundane daily life, and achieve a closer relationship with God. Rather than think we either win or lose, we’d be better off realizing the truth is we either win or learn.
Does our distracted, unfocused and impatient “let’s hurry this up” approach to prayer and services sound like we are growing closer to God through prayer? No, probably not. It leaves us empty and instead of getting up again and again, seven times, we blame the prayer, the services, the Cantor, the Rabbi—anyone but ourselves for being “bored.”
More than 85 percent of people facing a major illness, pray—more than those taking herbs or using other alternative healing modalities. Prayer is perhaps our most deeply human response to disease, and more and more evidence shows that praying has health benefits.
Since 1993, when Larry Dossey, MD wrote his book on the connection between prayer and medicine, Healing Words, scores of respected research has been conducted on the subject. The data documenting the value of prayer is impressive.
Harvard Medical School cardiovascular professor and researcher, Dr. Herbert Benson, suggests that daily prayer as a spiritual practice may help to deactivate genes that trigger inflammation in the body. He, and many others, suggests that the mind can impact the expression of our genes, which is gripping evidence for how prayer may affect our body at its most fundamental level. Prayer uplifts or calms, lowers blood pressure and inhibits the release of cortisol and other hormones, thus reducing stress on the immune system and promoting healing. Prayer can create feelings of gratitude, compassion, forgiveness, and hope, all of which are associated with healing and wellness.
Prayer in Judaism has two central purposes. One is to help us see that God is the only force in the world to whom we pray. The second purpose is to help us understand our complete reliance on God for our needs.
What can we do to strengthen our emotional skills in prayer, our understanding of prayer and our recognition of the healthy benefits of prayer in our lives and those of our children, while not giving up the sense of being able to be mindful of less formal prayerful thoughts throughout the day?
Perhaps the words of Moses in the last weeks of his life may help as we see in Deuteronomy 8:11-17. Keep in mind that, incredibly, he was speaking to a generation that just experienced all of the miracles of the Wilderness. How utterly on target today;
Take care lest you forget Hashem, your God, by not observing His commandments, His ordinances, and His decrees, which I command you today, lest you eat and be satisfied, and you build yourself good houses and settle…and you increase silver and gold for yourselves…and your heart will become haughty and you will forget Hashem, your God, Who took you out at he land of Egypt from the house of slavery…And you may say in your heart, “My strength and the might of my hand made me all this wealth.”
As one Rabbi observed, “Is the commandment of prayer to render honor with the mouth while the heart is distant?” If our hearts aren’t in it, like love, it’s obvious, rote, empty and our lover knows it. God knows it.
It’s time to awaken from our slumber. The mindset for prayer is referred to as kavanah, which is generally translated as “concentration” or “intent.” We need to remember that we are speaking to God and have that as our intention. If we do not have this minimal level of kavanah, then we may be in Synagogue but we are not praying; we are merely reading.
Look at the Amidah, the Shemonah Esrei, carefully and see that every conceivable human need is there. It’s up to us to spend the time to look inside this prayer and others, deeply, to connect with our “heart, mind and soul” to the words we read without expecting the words to jump off the page and grab us. We have to grab the words as the Talmud in Berachos 31a and Orach Chaim 93:3 teaches, “…not amid idle chatter but rather amid joy emanating from a mitzvah.”
As we leave Passover and move forward to Shavout only 7 weeks away, let’s delve deeper into prayer, to spend the time to create more kavanah, intent, to attend Synagogue services more often, to grab the words in the prayer book with joy and to feel the myriad of myriad of rewards of prayer. Come with a relaxed mind, spend time in deep relaxing breathing and mindful awareness and allow prayer to bring the benefits it is intended for.
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Dr. Michael R. Mantell, based in San Diego, provides cognitive transformational behavior coaching to business leaders, athletes, individuals and families to reach breakthrough levels of success and meaning in their professional and personal lives. He has authored four books, including his newest, The Link is What You Think. Mantell may be contacted via michael.mantell@sdjewishworld.com