Parasha Ki Tisa – Shabbat Parah
SAN DIEGO — Holy cow! Or should I say, holy cows! This week cows fill our Torah reading, from the sin of one cow, the golden calf, to – this being Shabbat Parah – another cow, the red heifer. Shabbat Parah, the Sabbath of the Red Heifer, occurs on the Shabbat prior to Shabbat Mevarkhim of the month of Nisan. This brings to mind a question. What do you get when you pamper a cow? Spoiled milk, that’s what! Ok, ok, it’s just a bad joke, I get it. But why did the secret service surround the president with dozens of cows? Of course, they were trying to beef up security. Ugh, I now, but writing this so close to Purim leaves its mark of still overflowing fun.
On a more serious note another question: how can it be that two cows can represent such different experiences? One symbolizes our rejection of Hashem, while the other embodies our power to refine, sanitize, and spiritually cleanse ourselves from sinfulness. Our relationship with Hashem, or our questioning it, seems to be the link here. How can it be that after experiencing the Exodus from Egypt the just freed Jews, not seeing quickly enough what they believed they needed, constructed an idol, an effigy, the golden calf, just 40 days after hearing Hashem say, “I am the Lord, your God, Who took you out of the land of Egypt, out of the house of bondage. You shall not have the gods of others in My presence. You shall not make for yourself a graven image or any likeness which is in the heavens above, which is on the earth below, or which is in the water beneath the earth” (Exodus 20:2-4). And from the way Moshe responded, breaking the first set of tablets and destroying the golden calf (and more), it is clear this act was a major violation of our injunction against idolatry, something so diametrically opposed to our faith and service to Hashem.
And further, how could Moshe – our leader, Moses – who experienced the closest relationship with Hashem, facing the Burning Bush, receiving the Ten Commandments and more, still ask, “And now, if I have indeed found favor in Your eyes, pray let me know Your ways, so that I may know You, so that I may find favor in Your eyes…” (Exodus 33:13). Moshe didn’t feel he knew the ways of Hashem? And we feel troubled by our own questions about Hashem? It seems that both the Israelites and Moses struggled to see the presence of Hashem.
Perhaps we all need some assurance, some vision, come clarity of G-d in our lives. But we are not meant to actually “see” G-d and still live, according to Torah. We find Hashem everywhere we look – but we must look with our eyes, hearts, and minds wide open and receptive. Like the story of the red heifer, a “hok,” a law with no clear reason, much of what we experience may make little or no sense. In his Guide to the Perplexed, Maimonides teaches us, “It is the object and center of the whole Torah to abolish idolatry and utterly uproot it” (Guide 3:37).
Our mitzvot bring us closer to Hashem, and while we all have a yetzer hara, an evil inclination, to build a golden calf for example, it is another cow, the miscalculated red heifer, that helps us rid ourselves of our impurities. We can listen to the voice in our heads that say, “STOP.” We can think about what we are doing, what our priorities and values are, and not be swept up by contemporary idol makers. With faith and trust, seeing His hand in our lives with every breath we take, it becomes clear. When do you feel most connected? What happens to that connection when you feel His void? One thing changes. You do. He is still, always, there. After all, He tells us, וַיֹּ֣אמֶר יְהֹוָ֔ה הִנֵּ֥ה מָק֖וֹם אִתִּ֑י And the Lord said: “Behold, there is a place with Me…” (Exodus 33:21). Not sometimes. Always.
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Michael Mantell, Ph.D., prepares a weekly d’var Torah for Young Israel of San Diego, where he and his family worship. He may be contacted via michael.mantell@sdjewishworld.com