Satire: Lesson Plans for ‘Uncritical’ Race Theory Curriculum

By Laurie Baron, Ph.D  

Laurie Baron

SAN DIEGO — Lesson 1: The Biblical Origins of Racial Hierarchy
Adam and Eve were White.  The mark of Cain was that he was turned Black for killing his brother Abel.  The son of Noah was Ham.  His son was Black and immigrated to Ethiopia.  From that time on the only thing Africa exported was nubile temptresses like the Queen of Sheba.  Jesus was White and his followers founded a new religion to dissociate themselves from their other Jewish contemporaries who had become so tanned from the bright Middle Eastern sun that they identified with Blacks and still do until today.

Lesson 2 The Glory of White Christian Europe                                                                                                                                                                                                      Once the Kings of Europe converted to Christianity and made it the state religion, their racial and religious superiority enabled them to stop of the spread of evil Islam at the Battle of Tours and through the Crusades, the Reconquista in Spain, and the Battle of Vienna in 1683.  Their victories provided the precedent for the recent Muslim Ban.  During the centuries of White Christian domination, Europe produced the greatest architecture, a lot more impressive than the mud huts of Africans and the tents of Arabs   Europeans explored and conquered the world with advanced sailing vessels while the Chinese called their boats junks realizing they were inferior.

Lesson 3  The United States: A Haven for Slavery with Some Reservations
When Western European nations abandoned Christianity for the Enlightenment, they were supplanted by the Whites who fled to the United States to guarantee their rights to life, liberty, and slaves.  The latter were happy because they had lifetime jobs and free room and board. The alternative to their benevolent bondage was being confined on desolate Indian reservations before these were allowed to run casinos.

Lesson 4  The Northern Aggression, the Lost Cause, and How the South Rose Again
The lamestream media brainwashed Northern Whites to abolish slavery.  The Southern Confederacy justifiably rebelled against the prospect of losing property prompting the Northern Union to invade it. Although the Confederacy lost the war, it eventually persuaded the Supreme Court that separate but equal treatment of the races was just if Whites remained in control of the country’s government and wealth.  This was the law of the land until commie liberals instigated by Jews outlawed discrimination and segregation.  The White backlash to this grew as people of color increasingly threatened to replace the White majority.  Fortunately, Jesus looked out for his people and deputized Donald Trump to rectify the situation and champion this curriculum so that White American students could feel proud about their racial heritage.

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Baron is professor emeritus of history at San Diego State University. He may be contacted via lawrence.baron@sdjewishworld.comSan Diego Jewish World points out to new readers that this column is satire, and nothing herein should be taken literally.

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