Satire: Translating Putinese

By Laurie Baron

Laurie Baron

Denazification=DeNATOization

Ukrainians=Lapsed Russians

Special Operations=Asymmetrical war waged until the world starts saying Kiev again

Genocide=What lapsed Russians do to ethnic Russians

Act of War=Anything that aids the lapsed Russians

Chernobyl =What will happen to other nuclear reactors if the lapsed Russians resist

Nuclear High Alert=Your next infrastructure projects should be building bomb shelters

United Nations=China, India, North Korea, Russia, and Syria

Defensible Borders=The borders of the former Soviet Union and communist bloc

Donald Trump=Neville Chamberlain

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Baron is professor emeritus of history at San Diego State University. He may be contacted via lawrence.baron@sdjewishworld.comSan Diego Jewish World points out to new readers that this column is satire, and nothing herein should be taken literally.