By Michael R. Mantell, Ph.D.
SAN DIEGO — To be a Jew is to be a grateful person. As we enter Shabbat with Psalm 92, we read, “It is good to give thanks.” Rabbi Zelig Pliskin teaches, “Living with gratitude elevates your entire life. You become a more spiritual person. You become a more joyful person. You become a kinder and more compassionate person. You become a calmer and more peaceful person. You become a person who lives in greater harmony with others.” All this simply by feeling and saying, “thank you.” And this week’s parasha, Ki Tavo, may be just the guide that comes to help increase our joy…and decrease our oy.
This week’s Torah reading asks us to carefully consider how we serve Hashem, “because you did not serve the L-rd, your G-d, with happiness and with gladness of heart, when [you had an] abundance of everything…you will serve your enemies.” This verse, according to the Arizal, teaches us to choose joy as we perform the mitzvot. Just doing mitzvot is not enough. Doing so with gladness of heart is the proper way. Remembering where we come from, not “who we are,” but “whose we are,” expands our gladness.
In 2005, researchers at the University of Pennsylvania did a study in which they explored psychological interventions that increased happiness. People who did “gratitude visits,” in which they simply wrote thank you notes to people that they never properly thanked and delivered their notes to them, had an immediate increase in their happiness, that affected their happiness for up to a month. Thank another for what they’ve done, and you’ll feel happier.
In the parasha, long before this study, we read of Moshe instructing the Jewish people that when they enter the land of Israel that Hashem gave to them as an eternal heritage, they should demonstrate their gratitude by bringing their first ripened fruits to the Beit HaMikdash. Hashem needs our thanks and our praise? No. When we fulfill our mission we feel more joy, not externally, but internally. I believe Hashem was hinting at how we can always feel more joy, by thanking Him. We can instill this joy within us every morning by beginning reciting the Modeh Ani, thanking Hashem for giving us life.
Wake up tomorrow morning with intentional, deeply held gratitude for your life, and with an understanding of where your life comes from. The One who is here, there, everywhere. Ready to have breakfast? Stop, really stop, and with a mind and heart full of awareness and gratitude, recognize where your food originates from. Imagine the genuine connection you desire with this Source of life and nourishment, and for all you have…so, are you smiling yet? That joyous feeling that’s overcoming you commences from your soul, the one He gave to you.
The parasha urges us to consider all in our lives with “hakarat ha-tov,” seeing the good. Remember that the word for Jew, Yehudi, comes from the root, l’hodot, to give thanks. What a wonderful time to read this parasha, within view of offering all a Shana tova, a good year, with gratitude and appreciation for all in our lives and with hopes for the sweetness to come. Remember, “this, too, is for the good,” is a superb mindset to carry, not just during Elul, but throughout the year.
You see, the “happiness and gladness of heart” spoken of in this week’s parasha, is YOURS to CREATE, not YOURS to BE GIVEN. It is within your ability, from within, not at all based on anything external, to rouse and stir these feelings. Who is the person who fully, wholeheartedly, and unreservedly does so? Or perhaps we could better ask as we do in Psalm 34, “Who is the man that desireth life, and loveth days, that he may see good therein?” Perhaps seeing good, finding growth in every step of life, recognizing the benefits in all that is put in front of us – the good and the not good – is the challenge of this week’s Torah reading. Literally, Ki Tavo, “When you enter,” from the moment we enter every day, and through every part of our day, we are taught the value of desiring life, loving our days, and seeing good throughout. We read in the parasha, “Then you shall rejoice with all the good that the L-rd, your G-d, has granted you and your household you, the Levite, and the stranger who is among you.” Rejoice.
Soon, in the Ten Days of Repentance, we will chant about the value of “Teshuva, Tefillah, and Tzedakah,” repentance, prayer, and charity, to help us return to our authentic selves, and to act in harmony and honorably with Hashem. Consider before we recite the Sh’ma we say, “Hashem, give our heart the capability to know and to understand, to learn and to teach to observe and to uphold WITH LOVE all the teachings of your Torah.” Nothing is given to us without our putting in the effort. The effort to find the “get to” and not the “have to” in our religious lives, to build the commitment to perform mitzvot with joy, not with oy, will, IY’H, bring us into a new year with hope and expectancy, with anticipation for all the good that He awaits to bring to those who “serve the L-rd, your G-d, with happiness and with gladness of heart…”
This week’s parasha is one of the most formidable and alarming chapters of the Torah. We find fourteen verses of the good things that will happen to the us if we faithfully obey Hashem’s divine commandments. And then, we read 54 verses that warn of the converse, the curses that will befall us if we do not faithfully observe all His commandments. There are many more curses than blessings in Ki Tavo, reflecting on our natural human inclination towards negativity.
Indeed, in the sixth Aliyah of the parasha we are taught, “All these curses will befall you, pursuing you and overtaking you to destroy you because you did not obey the L-rd, your G-d, to observe His commandments and statutes which He commanded you. And they will be as a sign and a wonder, upon you and your offspring, forever, because you did not serve the L-rd, your G-d, with happiness and with gladness of heart, when [you had an] abundance of everything.” The tochacha of Ki Tavo is a stark reminder that it is not enough to merely observe the mitzvos, but that it must be the sole driving force in our lives. Kavod, power, money, food and any other ‘pleasure’ are all illusionary sources of meaning – making Hashem King means realizing that He is the only source of true simcha.
This is the time of the year when we reflect, when we turn inward, review our past year’s successes and disillusionments, with the purpose of looking forward to a better year…in other words, gezunt, hatlacha and parnassa.
The Sforno, עובדיה ספורנו Obadia ben Jacob, (1475-1550) teaches, “In adhering to G-d’s covenant, Israel would achieve its natural and spiritual purpose.”
The “secret of success,” of “happiness,” may well be found and summed up simply in the parasha, (26:11) “Then, you shall rejoice with all the good that the L-rd, your G-d, has granted you and your household you, the Levite, and the stranger who is among you.” We shall…it seems that happiness, success, is a commandment! He tells us to focus on what we have, not on what we don’t have or haven’t accomplished. In fact, authentic joy, hakarat hatov, gratitude, the parasha tells us, is a foundation to our ability to succeed.
May we be zoche זוכה, be granted the merit, in the coming year to live up to our obligations and His covenant and see the success we all pray for with the coming of Moshiach and be blessed with healthy bodies, minds and souls.
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Michael R. Mantell, Ph.D., prepares a weekly D’var Torah for Young Israel of San Diego, where he and his family are members. They are also active members of Congregation Adat Yeshurun. He may be contacted via michael.mantell@sdjewishworld.com