By Donald H. Harrison
SAN DIEGO – This weekend Rabbi Mathew Marko will lead his last Shabbat services as the spiritual leader of Tifereth Israel Synagogue. He resigned at the two-year mark of a three-year contract. His explanation, in a letter to the Conservative synagogue’s congregants, should help us understand how sometimes life brings extraordinary pressures and stresses upon a congregational rabbi.
“For the past 8 years I have served as a congregational rabbi with very little personal time off,” he wrote. “And through those 8 years I’ve led my respective congregations (6 years at Beth Israel in Greenville, SC, and 2 years here at TIS) through 3 major crises. In my previous congregation, we experienced the horror of a murder/suicide between two members of the community, members who were highly engaged and whose families spanned 3 generations within the congregation. As you can imagine, this event was traumatizing for the entire community. And on a personal note, the man who was murdered had become a dear friend.
“Right before this happened, I had already decided it was time to move back to California. I went through the interview process, was offered a position, and it was during contract discussions that this tragedy struck. Feeling I had no other moral option, I informed my would-be new congregation that I had to withdraw my candidacy and remain where I was needed most. I did what I could to help the community begin healing from such intense and collective trauma. And then, not long after, the Covid pandemic stuck. We all remember what an impossibly trying time that was. Finally, as that began to ebb into our new normal, Marie and I visited Tifereth Israel, we fell in love, and made the move to San Diego without a break.
“We now all find ourselves 9 months after the horrific attack on October 7th, 9 months into a brutal and bloody war with no end in sight, and raging antisemitism the likes of which we’ve not seen since the Shoah. And in the middle of that, my beloved mother passed away.
“I now must admit that I am depleted and a bit broken and feel as though I have no other option but to step down from a full-time pulpit position. I am currently not able to be the rabbi I believe I can be, nor the rabbi that you deserve. This has been the hardest decision I’ve ever had to make but it is for the good of the congregation, the good of my family, and my own personal well-being. It is the only way I know of to find the strength to continue being effective in my rabbinate in the years to come, or as long as the Holy One grants me.
“I have no plans to leave San Diego, at least not in the foreseeable future. I am heading to Israel July 14th and have no specific date of return. I may spend a few weeks, or perhaps longer. I am planning on volunteering in several capacities. I spent a year on an agricultural kibbutz so I would like to help in that area as needed. I was also a professional carpenter before I became ordained, and I have some volunteer work already lined up in the Gaza envelope helping to rebuild homes.
“And to you, my friends, I say this is a powerful and resilient congregation. I urge you to continue doing what you are doing; loving each other, learning together, praying together, supporting one another, and building a community worthy of the eternal covenant between God and Israel.
“I am forever grateful to this amazing community. I love you, am humbled by your acceptance and guidance, and know the best is yet to come.
“Thank you for your support and understanding. And may the Holy One continue to bless you.”
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It was a gracious letter, can we not all agree, and his plan to help rebuild homes in the “Gaza Envelope” (whose residents recently renamed their area “The Israel Envelope”) bespeaks the close sister relationship between San Diego and Sha’ar Hanegev, a municipality with 10 kibbutzim and one moshav situated close to the Gaza border.
Now, Tifereth Israel’s board of directors under the leadership of the congregation’s president, Lisa Berman-Hernandez, must decide what to recommend to the congregation about replacing Rabbi Marko, who might also leave a vacancy on the faculty of the Community Jewish High School, at which many students from Tifereth Israel Synagogue and Temple Emanu-El study on Tuesday nights.
As it happens, Cantor/ Rabbi Hanan Leberman will be visiting San Diego once again in the middle of July, so his presence temporarily will provide spiritual leadership to the congregation. Subsidized through the generosity of some Tifereth Israel families, Leberman has been a regular commuter from his home in Jerusalem. He has helped to lead High Holy Day services and other celebrations of yom tovim.
Coincidentally, Ner Tamid Synagogue in neighboring Poway will bid farewell this weekend to Rabbi Sammy Seid and his wife, Cantor Heather Seid, so in the county there are two Conservative congregations needing spiritual guidance. The Seids had notified their congregation some time ago that they would be moving out of the area.
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Donald H. Harrison is publisher and editor of San Diego Jewish World.
Thank you for your service to the Jewish community. I enjoyed visiting the synagogue. It was a warm, welcoming place.