Satire: 50 Ways to Leave the White House

(Melody: Fifty Ways to Leave Your Lover)

 

Laurie Baron

By Laurie Baron 

The problem is that you lost the vote, she said to him.
The networks are telling you the results are grim.
Your chances are none and no longer slim.
There must be fifty ways to leave the White House.                                                                                          Fifty ways to leave the White House.

As first lady I try not to intrude.
However, the Penn state vote means that you are screwed.
But I’ll repeat myself at the risk of being sued.                                                                                                There must be fifty ways to leave the White House.
Fifty ways to leave the White House.

Work on a new con, Don.
Get yourself gone, Don
You don’t need to concede, Don.
Just move yourself out.
Play golf with friends, Don
Because your term must end, Don.
Just drop off the key, Don
And make room for Joe.

The problem is that you always enjoyed strife.                                                                                                                                              To remove you they might need the jaws of life.                                                                                                                                            For once it’s time you listen to your wife.                                                                                                                                                        There must be fifty ways to leave the White House.                                                                                                                                    Fifty ways to leave the White House.

Work on a new con, Don.
Get yourself gone, Don.
You don’t need to concede, Don.
Just move yourself out.
Play golf with friends, Don
Because this is the end, Don.
Just drop off the key, Don
And make room for Joe.

*

Laurie Baron, Ph.D, is professor emeritus of history at San Diego State University. He may be contacted via lawrence.baron@sdjewishworld.comSan Diego Jewish World points out to new readers that this column is satire, and nothing herein should be taken literally.

 

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