Satire: The Trump Who Tried to Steal the Election

 

Laurie Baron

By Laurie Baron

Voters living in cities liked elections a lot.
But the Trump, whose voters lived elsewhere, did not.
The Trump hated voting when it was by mail.
Now, we all know the reason, he feared he would fail.
He said he suspected dead people would vote.
And illegals would smuggle ballots by boat.
He charged that his foes rigged the election.
Of course, we know this was blatant projection.
Whatever the reason, he could never concede.
He spouted conspiracies just to mislead.
He filed lawsuits when recounts changed nothing.
He dispatched Rudi to do his frothing.
Did he know in his heart that he had lost?
And that sowing distrust had a dangerous cost?
For a democracy it’s not a trifle.
To rile supporters brandishing rifles.
He persuaded states to negate others’ results.
And those who opposed him met with insults.
He really dreaded being replaced,
And for posterity being disgraced.
Or was this fuss just a fundraising pretense
To pay for his campaign four years hence?

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Baron is professor emeritus of history at San Diego State University. He may be contacted via lawrence.baron@sdjewishworld.com. San Diego Jewish World points out to new readers that this column is satire, and nothing herein should be taken literally.