How can we discern God?

Parasha Ki Tisa – Shabbat Parah

By Michael R. Mantell, Ph.D.

SAN DIEGO — Let’s begin with a question. How could Moshe, who experienced the closest relationship with Hashem, facing the Burning Bush, the ten plagues, receiving the ten commandments and more, still ask, “And now, if I have indeed found favor in Your eyes, pray let me know Your ways, so that I may know You…” Moshe didn’t feel he knew the ways of Hashem? And WE feel troubled by our own questions about Hashem?

We certainly aren’t the first generation to struggle with our faith. We live in an age with seemingly decreasing faith and trust, not just in Hashem, but in each other. Can you imagine seeing the demonstration of Hashem’s influence in the ten plagues, the splitting of the Red Sea, giving manna in the desert, the Revelation at Sinai, and still questioning the presence of Hashem in one’s life?

Both the Israelites and Moses, as we see in this week’s parasha, struggled to see the presence of Hashem. The people lost their patience, faith and steadfastness, and demanded a visible sign of Hashem’s Presence in their lives. They wanted Aaron to help them build a golden calf, the epitome of what was forbidden by the Second Commandment. What triggered our people’s loss of faith? Why is it so difficult to remain faithful? They certainly had faith, but in the face of uncertainty, like so many today facing COVID, they could not remain steadfast in their faith.

Were the Israelites demanding, insisting, that life go their way, that they “must see” Hashem? Did they think of circumstances unfolding around them as “awful and horrible,” not merely “unfortunate”? Were they believing, erroneously of course, that they “could not bear” the situation another moment longer? And worse, were they depreciating Hashem and Moshe, because of what they were doing, or not doing, in accord with their “musts”? My teacher, Albert Ellis, Ph.D., once observed, “When people change their irrational beliefs to undogmatic flexible preferences, they become less disturbed.”

Perhaps we all need some assurance, some vision, come clarity of G-d in our lives. And we have these, but we simply won’t see them because they are not present on our terms. We can find Hashem everywhere we look – but that requires that we look with our eyes, hearts and minds wide open and thoroughly receptive.

In his Guide to the Perplexed, Maimonides teaches us, “It is the object and center of the whole Torah to abolish idolatry and utterly uproot it.” Our mitzvot bring us closer to Hashem, and while we all have a yetzer hara, an evil inclination, to build a golden calf for example, it is another cow, the miscalculated red heifer, that helps us rid ourselves of our impurities. When life turns in ways that we insist it doesn’t, when we think God is not with us, our inability to maintain steadfast faith becomes a step towards idolatry.

We can think about what we are doing, what our priorities and values are, and not be swept up by contemporary idol makers or rigid, extreme demands that life unfolds the way we claim it must. With faith and trust, not ultimatums, seeing His hand in our lives with every breath we take becomes clear. He is there. With overflowing continual chesed.

After all, He tells us, וַיֹּ֣אמֶר יְהֹוָ֔ה הִנֵּ֥ה מָק֖וֹם אִתִּ֑י And the Lord said: “Behold, there is a place with Me…” Not sometimes. Always. Where is that place especially? Says the parasha, “Thus shall the children of Israel observe the Sabbath, to make the Sabbath throughout their generations as an everlasting covenant.” Hinei makom iti, on this, Rashi and the Midrash in Bereishit Rabbah 68:8 explain that makom is another name for God’s Presence, “the place is with me,” not “I am the place.” In other words, the Midrash tells us, “God comprises the universe, but the universe does not encompass God.” Unless our eyes and hearts are open, unless we are prepared to encompass Him and see the place that He creates for us to be near to Him in our lives, we miss seeing Him in our world. But He continually invites us, Hinei makom iti, to see that there is a place near to Him for each of us.

Hashem is telling us clearly where, each week, we can be with Him. It is not a physical place, but a place in time that He directs us to, “V’shamru V’nei Yisrael et HaShabbat.” Here we can experience and be present with Hashem, if we but open our minds and our hearts to this remarkable experience. Nothing takes place without Him, yet we blind ourselves when we do not see that place in which he lives in our lives.

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Michael R. Mantell, Ph.D., prepares a weekly D’var Torah for Young Israel of San Diego, where he and his family are members. They are also active members of Congregation Adat Yeshurun.  He may be contacted via michael.mantell@sdjewishworld.com