By Michael R. Mantell, Ph.D.
SAN DIEGO — You’ve heard it many times, “Man plans, G-d laughs.” Or perhaps, like me, you’ve heard this version, “Mentsch tracht, Gott lacht.” I like “Man thinks, G-d Winks.” Regardless, like all of us who prefer to live without being mutchet or tcheppeht, (pressured or bothered), Jacob found that life has its challenges and disappointments. Just when we think all is well in our family, in our career, in our lives, G-d shows us He has another lesson for us to learn. It seems the only thing predictable about life is how unpredictable it can be.
Look at the first word of the parasha, “Vayeishev,” “settled,” or “lived.” Hashem often has different plans for us, however. Perhaps we can find this equanimity in the next worlds, but not necessarily so easily in this world. The Torah portion reads, “Now Jacob was settled in the land where his father had sojourned…” The Bible then tells of the story of Jacob’s son Joseph and how he is sold into slavery by his brothers. Rashi, quoting the Midrash, comments: “Jacob wished to dwell in peace and tranquility but immediately was beset by Joseph’s troubles and tribulations.”
Just when Yaakov thinks he finally has achieved this tranquil experience, once again, he’s faced with the challenge of the loss of Yosef hits him.
We learn from Rabbi Yerucham Levovitz, that the purpose of this world is not necessarily quietude. The Sefat Emes teaches us that the goal of life is to labor for the sake of G-d. Dwelling in peace? That make come in 120 years. Rabbi Dr. Tzvi Hersh Weinreb tells us, “The Torah’s ideal is a life of action and involvement in worldly affairs. The Torah rejects the attitude of detachment and passivity, which is implicit in the teaching of Eastern religions. The Torah cannot envision the good life if that life is without challenge. Achievement of inner peace is not the ultimate value, especially not if it results in withdrawal from responsible action within society.”
That is worth re-reading. Wow! We see that according to these Torah scholars, our world is for growth, not peace or tranquility. Our approach to “mindfulness” is not about detaching passively from the world but to meet those difficulties with strength, inner clarity of thinking, to best confront and grow through challenges and adversities.
A lesson? Yes, a lesson. This is based on the Hasidic notion of yeridah tzorech aliyah, meaning “descent for the sake of ascent.” Every setback is a setup for a comeback. The only reason we fall is to rise. Perhaps this is a key life lesson in this week’s parasha. From Rashi we learn that Jacob wanted to live in peace, in shalva, in tranquility, but it was not to be. From the Ramban we see again the notion that we can plan all we want, but it is G-d’s ultimate plan that takes precedence, “Hagezera emet, vehacharitzut sheker.” We live as partners with G-d, between our own free will and G-d’s blueprint for us. Mishlei 19:21 teaches us, “There are many thoughts in a man’s heart, but God’s plan-that shall stand.”
At the beginning of the parasha, we read that Jacob sent Joseph to Hebron. But later Joseph sees it’s all G-d’s will, and shares with his brothers, “So it was not you who sent me here, but Hashem” (Genesis 45:8). Vayeishev, perhaps more than any parasha, teaches us that downturns aren’t permanent.
It’s as if we are shown how we are to live, in a state of “tension” between stopping, settling, and moving. The parasha opens by telling us that Jacob settled in the land where his father had resided. The Kli Yakar observed that his settling was a spiritual one, not simply a physical one. But experiencing all the adversity he did, he simply wanted to stop and focus on his spiritual growth, with tranquility.
Do we always see, are we mindful of, His hand in our lives and in the lives of our family and our friends? When His plan deviates from our own hopes and dreams, do we come closer to Him or are we so shaken that we turn away? When we daven, pray, we would be wise to be mindful of the words that teach us that, like Joseph who saw that Hashem was always with him (Genesis 39:2), that He is with us, teaching us, guiding us, and assisting us.
Those fortunate enough to see this undoubtedly lead a rich, comforted, life.
As Rudyard Kipling put it beautifully in his poem “If.” “If you can meet with triumph and disaster and treat those two imposters just the same…You are a better man than most.”
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Michael R. Mantell, Ph.D., prepares a weekly D’var Torah for Young Israel of San Diego, where he and his family are members. They are also active members of Congregation Adat Yeshurun. He may be contacted via michael.mantell@sdjewishworld.com