By Michael R. Mantell, Ph.D.
EL CAJON, California — Who doesn’t want to stay young while growing older in years? The Torah is telling us that with faith in Hashem, all things work out in the end. After all, Sarah had a child at age 100 and Abraham lived to 175 years old. The Torah reminds us that Sarah was 127 when she died (Genesis 23:1). Of course, we wisely also utilize what science tells us about possible ways to reduce diseases like dementia, to add life to our years, and years to our lives. More on that another time.
Why would we ever give up on hope though? All we need do is pause, consider the gift, the lesson, of Chayei Sarah, and never give up believing EWOP = everything works out perfectly. As a couple, Abraham and Sarah together faced pain, obstacles and challenges. Their emunah was painfully tested and what do they teach us? “Kol mah d’avid Rachmana l’tova oseh…” Whatever Hashem does is for the good. Sarah and Abraham believed and responded “l’tovah,” to whatever happened in their lives. They taught us to accept the bitter to get to the sweet.
A famed Harvard University study found that the following personality characteristics relate to happiness in aging:
- A future orientation and the ability to plan positively (“I figure if I can do this when I’m 85, I’ll be doing pretty well.”)
- The capacity for both gratitude and forgiveness
- The ability to see the world through the eyes of another
- The desire to do things with, and for, people
Does this not sound like Abraham and Sarah? Their accomplishments demonstrated the centrality of mindset, of attitude, of never giving up hope, and that age is never to be considered an obstacle to continued achievement, to worthwhile contribution and to be in the flow, fully engaged in the world. The Torah tells us that “…Abraham was old, advanced in days….” (Bereishit 24:1), referring to the effect that every day of his life left on him. In fact, the Zohar (1, 224a) teaches that “advanced in days” means that Abraham used every day of his life in the service of Hashem. His life was not defined by his body’s age, but by what his soul experienced.
Abraham is described as zakein, or well advanced in years. Zakein is an acronym for “zeh shekaneh chachma” – a person who has acquired wisdom. From the Talmud we learn that “the righteous are called living even after death.” This week’s parsha illuminates this point in the title, focusing on Sarah’s life, not her death.
Imagine if Sarah and Abraham gave up hope. And imagine how much more positive our own lives will be by bringing emotional sensitivity to others, of course firmly anchored in our deep trust in Hashem, IY’H (If it be God’s will), to 120 years.
This parsha is not only about the legacy of Sarah, but also about the important transition to the next generation. Abraham was focused on ensuring his values and vision would be passed down, so that the future would be secure.
Are we mindful that the way we conduct ourselves is leaving something meaningful for the next generation to follow? Are we actively preparing them to pick up the proverbial baton and carry us into the future?
Sarah’s life exemplified intentionality and grace, even amidst significant challenges. She strived to make the most of each moment, viewing every day as an opportunity for growth and impact. In this way, she built a lasting legacy that transcended her physical lifetime.
Similarly, we would be wise to ask ourselves – are we being deliberate and present in our daily lives? Are we focusing not just on our own needs and desires, but on how we can positively shape the world for those who will come after us? Like Abraham, we have a responsibility to ensure a smooth generational transition, rooted in the enduring values and principles that define our lives.
Sarah’s life of consistency reminds us that true legacy is not about accumulating wealth or status, but about the indelible mark we leave on the hearts and minds of others. It’s about living each day with steadiness to the fullest, finding meaning and purpose in both the joyful and the difficult. By doing so, we can create a lasting impact that extends far beyond our own lifetime.
The opening verse of this week’s Torah portion captures the stability of Sarah’s life: “And the life of Sarah was one hundred years and twenty years and seven years.” Why is the word “years” repeated three times? To teach us, “that every digit is to be expounded upon individually: when she was one hundred years old, she was like a twenty-year-old in piety. And when she was twenty, she was like a seven-year-old in beauty” (Rashi from Midrash Bereishit Rabba 58:1).
Sarah embodied the rare gift of living life in full color. In her eyes shone the wonder of a seven-year-old discovering the world anew each morning. Her heart beat with the passionate idealism of a twenty-year-old. Yet her spirit carried the serene wisdom of a centenarian who had witnessed a hundred years of humanity’s triumphs and struggles. Sarah transformed ordinary moments into lessons in living. She showed us that time isn’t measured in minutes and hours, but in moments of connection, purpose, and joy.
Her life stands as a testament to what it means to live with intention and grace. In Sarah’s world, every sunrise offered a fresh canvas, every conversation held the potential for deeper understanding, and every challenge presented an opportunity for growth. Through Sarah, we learned that true wisdom lies not in counting our days, but in making our days count.
Rashi teaches that all the years of Sarah’s life were good. But didn’t she suffer much in her life (childlessness, experiencing famine and exile, taken captive, to name a few of the adversities she faced)? Rabbi Zushe of Anipoli explained that Sarah mastered the sight to be able to see “this too is for the good.” Sarah was ceaselessly aware that events others may have viewed as bad were always from Hashem. She was capable therefore of evaluating these events as being ultimately being positive. The quality of one’s life is not reliant on external situations.
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Michael R. Mantell, Ph.D., prepares a weekly D’var Torah for Young Israel of San Diego, where he and his family are members. They are also active members of Congregation Adat Yeshurun.