By Laurie Baron
MARGATE, New Jersey─ “The Fright Before Christmas”
Twas the night before Christmas, and at the North Pole
Santa was worried some elf was a mole
For a terrorist network that wanted him dead
And planned to blow up his flying sled.
Checking the elves with a metal detector
To ferret out the ISIS defector.
And to achieve a bit more calm
He frisked the reindeer to search for a bomb. .
Among all the toys in his large sack
Were there guns which were bound for Iraq?
Or knives or swords or real light sabers
Sharpened to kill somebody’s neighbors.
Before he flew over the USA
He asked for permission from the TSA.
Could he count on its friendly sky
Or would a missile strike him on high?
Would chimneys be rigged with IED’s?
And milk and cookies be laced with disease?
There was so much that currently scared him.
He might skip Africa to dodge Boko Haram.
And the Holy Land was in such a mess
Dare he bring gifts and ignore BDS?
Was it too risky to visit France
He doubted it wise to take such a chance.
Then he remembered peace was the reason.
That he spread joy during this season.
He embarked on his journey disregarding his fright.
“Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night.”
*
Baron is professor emeritus of history at San Diego State University. Currently serving as the Ida E. King Distinguished Visiting Professor of Holocaust Studies at the Richard Stockton College in Galloway, New Jersey, he may be contacted via lawrence.baron@sdjewishworld.com San Diego Jewish World points out to new readers that this column is satire, and nothing herein should be taken literally.