Lawrence Baron

By Laurie Baron SAN DIEGO―He thought the world was out to get him. Consequently, he legally purchased semi-automatic guns and high capacity ammunition clips despite the crazy things he had said in the past. His name is Wayne LaPierre.  His job is that of executive vice president of the National Rifle Association. * U.S. Senators […]

By Laurie Baron SAN DIEGO-Governor Bill Haslam of Tennessee signed legislation authorizing the use of the electric chair if lethal injections are not available for implementing the death sentence.  He assured critics of electrocution that the procedure will be administered in a progressive manner employing green energy sources and wireless technology and permitting the condemned

By Laurie Baron SAN DIEGO-The United States Department of Justice has caught five Chinese officials of hacking into the computer sites of five American incorporations.  Further investigations have revealed that they are also eavesdropping on internet publications like The San Diego Jewish … 我们正在听. * The Air Force has readied planes in case the State

By Laurie Baron SAN DIEGO-After devoting most of its broadcasts to the search of Malaysian Flight 370, CNN shifted its coverage to Donald Sterling.  Both stories deal with something that was flying high, veered off course, and came crashing down to earth.  The only difference is that Sterling continues to emit pings. * Rabbi Yaakov

By Laurie Baron SAN DIEGO-Donald Sterling asked for forgiveness for making racist remarks to his mistress during his interview with Anderson Cooper broadcast on CNN.  Journalists have doubted his sincerity because he allegedly was overheard after the program saying how relieved he was that Don Lemon wasn’t assigned to interview him. * When the St.

By Laurie Baron SAN DIEGO-Vladimir Putin is sending mixed messages to the world. One day he says he’ll withdraw his troops from the border of eastern Uktaine; the next he is celebrating the triumph of the annexation of the Crimea. When reporters questioned what his plans for Ukrine were, he cryptically replied, “Donetsk don’t tell.”

By Laurie Baron SAN DIEGO-The flight of a U-2 spy plane over Los Angeles snarled air traffic over Southern California by confusing the FAA’s computer systems.  Everyone is concerned that it caused many commercial flight delays, but no one seems concerned that the Air Force is conducting spy flights over the United States? * Russia

By Laurie Baron SAN DIEGO-Now that he has been banned from NBA Basketball, Donald Sterling is looking into a new line of work.  ESPN reportedly has rejected his proposal for a new program in which he would interview only white NBA players. * Senate Republicans blocked an attempt to vote on raising the minimum wage,

By Laurie Baron SAN DIEGO-The pressure is mounting on Los Angeles Clippers’ owner Donald Sterling to resign after his racist rant to his mistress was made public.  Since the NBA may demand that he sell the team, he is considering an offer from Nevada rancher Cliven Bundy to move the franchise to his ranch. *

By Laurie Baron SAN DIEGO-Georgia’s governor signed the “Guns Everywhere Law” which allows people with concealed weapons permits to bring guns into airports, bars, churches, schools, government buildings and parts of airports.  Although he heralded it as a victory for Second Amendment rights, Catholic Priests have expressed concern that their altar boys will be packing

By Laurie Baron SAN DIEGO-A teenage boy from San Jose stowed away in the wheel-well of a Hawaiian Airline jet flying to Maui and survived.  When asked why he did this, he replied that there was more legroom there than in the economy seats.  Since he nearly died from hypothermia and lack of oxygen, Hawaiian

By Laurie Baron SAN DIEGO-The shakeup at Manischewitz continues. To maximize profits, its new owner, a subsidiary of Bane Capital, has decided to produce Yom Kippur foods targeted at Jews who eat on the Day of Atonement. The company is still debating whether this line of products will be called Half Fast or Not So

By Laurie Baron SAN DIEGO-The Manischewitz Company announced this week that it has been sold to Sankaty Advisors, a subsidiary of Bain Capital.  Sankaty plans to outsource the production of matzo to Third World countries with hot climates.  Following the Passover tradition, slave laborers will carry the flattened matzo dough on their backs to bake